Ah, those glorious college years. You remember them vividly and with a hollow place inside your chest that should be filled with thoughts of scantily-clad drunk girls and irresponsible drinking. You have three things to show for your time spent in school: a college education, a beer gut, and a closet full of funny t-shirts. You may want to go out and use some of that college money to get some new, grown-up clothes. You can't keep wearing those funny t-shirts everywhere, my friend. There are, in fact, some places where funny t-shirts are a definite bad idea.
One of the most important places that you're going to want to ditch the idea of wearing funny t-shirts is to the job interview. You're a burgeoning professional now that you're out of college, but that first step to that new personae is to actually get a job. For anywhere from four to ten years, you have worn funny t-shirts and pajama pants to class, meetings with administrators, and out to eat. You may have forgotten what a sloppy individual that's turned you into. You will never get the job you want if you don't wear something with a collar to the all-important interview.
Once you've managed not to completely turn an employer off from what minimal skills you have to offer, it's time for you to make things right with the Big Guy upstairs. You did so many bad things in college, that it is impossible to count the sins. You would need a calculator that works a lot better than that old TI-85 you spilled beer all over. Once again, your funny t-shirts are not going to help you here. You're going to need to kiss some serious heavenly booty to make amends, and your current wardrobe isn't going to impress a Sunday School teacher, let alone a deity.
In the world of the post-graduate, it is much more difficult to find a girl to take notice in you. In college, everyone just wanted to have fun. Money was less important to a woman and it was more about looks, personality, intelligence, booze, or just good bedroom skills...if you know what I mean. Now that you're cruising the bars and clubs for suitable mates, your funny t-shirts are just not going to cut it. You need to look like you have some cash in your bank account, even if you don't have a bank account yet. If you don't, then you might as well learn to be asexual and to love your own company.
That's it, friends. I've laid it out pretty well, I think. You can't have a job, religious experiences, or a girlfriend if you don't stop wearing your funny t-shirts everywhere. Jogging pants are also unacceptable. I know that collared shirts and slacks aren't very comfortable, but they do look nice and they rarely have as many soy sauce stains on them. If you want to be treated as a grown-up in the world of post-graduation, then you need to act like it. Save the video games and booze for after 7pm.
One of the most important places that you're going to want to ditch the idea of wearing funny t-shirts is to the job interview. You're a burgeoning professional now that you're out of college, but that first step to that new personae is to actually get a job. For anywhere from four to ten years, you have worn funny t-shirts and pajama pants to class, meetings with administrators, and out to eat. You may have forgotten what a sloppy individual that's turned you into. You will never get the job you want if you don't wear something with a collar to the all-important interview.
Once you've managed not to completely turn an employer off from what minimal skills you have to offer, it's time for you to make things right with the Big Guy upstairs. You did so many bad things in college, that it is impossible to count the sins. You would need a calculator that works a lot better than that old TI-85 you spilled beer all over. Once again, your funny t-shirts are not going to help you here. You're going to need to kiss some serious heavenly booty to make amends, and your current wardrobe isn't going to impress a Sunday School teacher, let alone a deity.
In the world of the post-graduate, it is much more difficult to find a girl to take notice in you. In college, everyone just wanted to have fun. Money was less important to a woman and it was more about looks, personality, intelligence, booze, or just good bedroom skills...if you know what I mean. Now that you're cruising the bars and clubs for suitable mates, your funny t-shirts are just not going to cut it. You need to look like you have some cash in your bank account, even if you don't have a bank account yet. If you don't, then you might as well learn to be asexual and to love your own company.
That's it, friends. I've laid it out pretty well, I think. You can't have a job, religious experiences, or a girlfriend if you don't stop wearing your funny t-shirts everywhere. Jogging pants are also unacceptable. I know that collared shirts and slacks aren't very comfortable, but they do look nice and they rarely have as many soy sauce stains on them. If you want to be treated as a grown-up in the world of post-graduation, then you need to act like it. Save the video games and booze for after 7pm.
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